We are all the time hearing things like: “Love yourself; Self-love is of importance; Give love to yourself; etc.” Do we know what this means in the right way? Or, are we thinking that we do love ourselves, but somehow the feeling of happiness and satisfaction is missing in our everyday life?
I thaught how I do love myself
Before, I was a woman thinking of how I love myself and that I do it in such a good way. I was so convinced how I do it well, but the reality was different, in everyday life I lacked feelings of happiness, pleasure, and satisfaction.
Somewhere, I have read something about how our reality and what is happening in our life is a direct reflection of our inner world. These words, have hit me like a thunderbolt, but not in the way of realising the truth from that, at that time I thought of these words as nonsense and I found them offensive.
I was saying to myself: “I feel fine inside, how is it possible that my life is not as good as I am feeling, and how can we humans control reality, that is in the hands of destiny!” At that time I wasn’t aware of my thoughts, my beliefs, and my mindset.
Everything was a lie
The truth is that I was lying to myself at that time, I wasn’t facing reality in the right way, and I was avoiding to leave a comfort zone. All this, have led me to even worse outcomes in my outside world, so I have entered several narcissistic relationships, my friends were also some kind of narcissist people who were only taking advantage of me and using me, I started to use alcohol and some toxic substances, and I was not in control of my sexual energy and purity.
I was doing all this, and still, I was repeating how I do love myself. I was living this horrible way of life, and I was feeling worse and worse how the days were passing by.
Impact of spirituality
What is very interesting in all this, is that I was reading spiritual books all the time, about our ego, subconscious mind, changing ourselves for the better, etc. This has helped me over some time to realise that I am total versus to myself and that I am harming myself and abusing my beautiful body, so I have stopped with toxic substances and alcohol abuse, but somehow I was still engaged with toxic people.
I didn’t know how to end this vicious cycle. I wasn’t aware that I was trying to find love in all other resources than in myself. Doing the spiritual work over the time I have improved the way I was living and thinking, helped me to overcome my ego patterns and so much more, but I wasn’t able to find the love within myself.
And all this is normal, coz healing is a process, and you can’t make it all at once alone. At that time I was too proud to ask and seek help, so my development process lasted for years.
Overcoming shame trough work
I had progressed to a certain extent about self-love, especially with the love of my body image and acceptance of my sexuality.
To love my body appearance and body image I learned by working as a Go-Go dancer and topless dancer. I got comfortable to show my body and to feel good doing it, even to accept my A cups breasts coz I saw that they are not ‘making’ any less money than some bigger breasts possessed by other girls.
The love for the sexual energy I somehow always had, from the first sexual experience I fell in love with sex. I never had a problem to orgasm in any way, and I have to mention that every woman can orgasm in several ways, also I never had a problem to say what I want in bed or to put boundaries for what I do not want at that moment.
The external help on self- love journey
All this was fine, but still, I wasn’t very good at maintaining my toxic friendships and toxic partners and setting boundaries for them. After some time, I have stopped these friendships, but I continued searching for love in other places rather than within myself.
All this started to really affect me, and finally, I admitted to myself that I can’t heal myself completely alone, so I have decided to search for help. I found one gorgeous, unique lady life coach called Danijela Jokić-Vaislay. I hired her to be my coach and to help me to achieve self-love so that I can be my own best lover of life.
I am a new person now
I am now an entirely new person. Whatever I do now, I do from a place of love. I eat healthily coz I love myself, I workout, not coz I hate my body, but I love my body, I take myself outside to feel the connection with nature, to get some vitamin D and to raise my vibrations. When I feel like I miss having a boyfriend, that day I make a date with myself and have loving self-pleasuring practice. I am kicking out all the bad habits and setting healthy boundaries for whatever is needed, no matter is it a friend, a potential boyfriend, my family, etc.
Danijela helped me not only to gain self-love back, but she also helped me to develop my coaching program, with a niche of sexual-confidence and self-love coaching. As I said before, I loved sex since the first time I have tasted it, and I can teach you how to become a multiorgasmic woman. I went from not loving myself to loving myself completely, so I can show you the way.
Even coaches have coaches
As you see, it is perfectly fine to search for help and that even coaches have their own coaches. Sometimes, we can’t see ourselves objectively, and we can’t find out what is stopping us from becoming the best versions of ourselves, or we can see that we are stuck, but we don’t know the right techniques and ways out. If you feel attracted to me and my coaching program, feel free to book a discovery